When my young children built play forts, they took what materials they found and put them together as it struck their fancy. What resulted would not protect them from the weather, nor would they last long. This was not a problem, as they would lose interest after a while and go on to something else.

Those who build real houses, start by studying the architect’s plan before ever ordering material. Before the sound of a hammer is heard, the site has to be prepared. During the building, the foreman watches to see that all is done according to specs. The inspector signs off to be sure it is according to code. Built correctly, a house will outlast its builder.

How many have built their marriage like the children building a play area? We try things out to see how they work, if they feel good. We experiment with different emotional, social, sexual and financial boundaries. When things don’t fit, we move on to the next relationship, leaving a trail of bits of broken hearts, mostly our own. It is amazing how we slide into relationships and even marriage without any real plan and certainly a poor understanding of God’s plan for marriage.

God has given us the design for lasting, joyful covenant marriages in his Word. We should have those blueprints in our minds and developing character in our hearts long before we ever think about dating or marriage. What change would happen in our dating patterns if we viewed their impact on our eventual covenant marriage rather than just what might happen that weekend?

Ruth tells a winsome story of redemption and love. Ruth is a foreign born woman who marries into the covenant of God and his people Israel. Through her actions we see her develop the character of a true daughter of Israel. She was probably in her 20’s, athletically attractive and hard working. But it was her faithfulness to her family that Boaz notes, both when he meets her and after she requests that he marry her and become her family’s kinsman redeemer.

In v 10 Boaz says to Ruth: The Lord bless you, my daughter. This kindness is greater than that which you showed earlier. The word Boaz uses for kindness is a special word that means covenant love. Ruth had refused to abandon Naomi. She worked hard to take care of her. She took the covenantal bond seriously with her new family and their God. She was willing to marry an older man to keep the family name from dying out.

Covenant is built on character. If marriage is built on looks, then it may last as long as the looks last. If it is built on money or fun times, it may last only as long as the market is good and the good times roll. Proverbs 31:30 says: Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Ruth feared the Lord. So did Boaz. Ruth had charm and beauty, but Boaz praised her for her character which would last long after the others faded.

Covenant protects. Boaz protected Ruth from the first time he saw her. He made sure that she was not molested by the harvesters. He made sure that she and her mother got enough grain to eat. And when he agreed to be her kinsman redeemer, he protected her from being childless and from her family’s name dying out.

Boaz and Ruth were people of character. They feared the Lord and trusted in his care. God provided for them. But what about us? Most of us have not lived our lives by God’s Word when it comes to marriage and relationships. We have used each other. We were more like children building a play area rather than a builder using the architect’s design. We have rejected God’s Word and have paid the price with pain.

What can we do? Remember that our past might determine our present, but it need not determine our future. God can take us even now and build in us the character that we need to live godly and successful lives. If we are willing to let the Holy Scripture into our minds to determine our choices, the Holy Spirit will work great things in our lives.

Here is encouragement from the story of Ruth. Remember: this was a second marriage for Ruth and probably Boaz too. God can take marriages that do not start well and even second marriages and bless them with grace. God built the house of Boaz and Ruth to yield eternal blessing. The became the ancestors of King David and ultimately Jesus Christ. What blessing may God work in your house if you follow his Word?